Particularly your children.
However, you are probably the last to know! When’s the last time you patted yourself on the back? How often do you feel good about what you do? At the end of the day, are you glad to be a parent?
Top Ten Things You Are Doing Right
- You try to set a good example for your children. Children learn by example. So, how you live your life, is the way they will learn to live theirs. When you take care of yourself, act responsibly, follow the rules, show affection, and be honest and trustworthy (and a million other things you do each day), your children are learning how to conduct themselves.
- You teach morals and values. In your desire for your children to grow up to be responsible, caring, loving, trustworthy, moral adults, you teach them right from wrong, and hold them accountable for their own actions.
- You foster independence. Children need to gradually take over more and more responsibility for themselves; and you, in turn, are gradually backing away more and more. If you do your job well, you will actually work your way out of a job! That would mean you have raised your children to be independent adults. Then you will have been truly successful.
- You discipline constructively. Discipline is actually defined as, “training that develops self-control.” So, you hold your children accountable for their actions, teaching standards of behavior. When difficulty with self-control arises, you step in and provide appropriate consequences for the infractions.
- You set realistic expectations. It’s a balancing act when encouraging them to do their best, while being sensitive to their limitations. You reevaluate your expectations as they mature and develop greater abilities.
- You value education. Showing an interest in what your children are learning, and how well they are doing, conveys a sense of importance about learning. Maintaining contact with the school also shows interest and active involvement in the goings-on of your children’s academic lives.
- You spend time together. Whether it’s eating dinner, reading a bedtime story, watching a movie, playing a game, cooking, folding laundry, shopping or going on an outing, working and playing together builds a sense of belonging, community and connectedness. Being there for your children provides security and trust.
- You express support. Your children need to know that you are proud of them. You praise their efforts and applaud their accomplishments. You beam with pride at their school plays, concerts, ball games and spelling bees. You show your children your support by being their biggest fan, and all-time cheerleader.
- You show affection. Hug, kiss and cuddle your children for as long as they will allow. And when they get too old for ‘mushy’ stuff, you look for other ways to stay connected, such as a gentle touch, a squeeze of the hand, an arm around the shoulder, etc.
- And most importantly, you love your children unconditionally. This affirms your children and shows them they are valued and will always be loved. no matter what! Loving gives them a sense of security and a strong foundation that they can depend upon as they venture out into the world.
- And at the end of each day, I encourage you to stop and think about not went wrong or what you didn’t get done. Instead, think about what you did right—and pat yourself on the back!
Tags: affection, connectedness, Discipline, expectations, independence, morals, praise, responsibility, set example, support, values
