Dr Vicki - Better Parenting Institute
Dr Vicki - Better Parenting Institute
 
  Dr Vicki - Better Parenting Institute
 

Posts Tagged ‘Child Development’

Playing With Your Kids: Infancy To Age Two

Friday, July 16th, 2010

Playing With Blocks

Kids Are From Krypton, Parents Are From Pluto Radio Series update July 15, 2010: The key to playing with your kids is to provide toys and activities that meet their developmental level. Kids can play with the same toys for many months, playing with them in different ways as they reach new developmental stages. Some of the basic toys, such as blocks, serve so many developmental purpose that you don’t need to be quick to replace them and move on to something “newer.” For example, infants can begin to hold blocks and develop some muscle development and coordination. As kids grow, blocks help develop many other skills: object permanence (awareness that things exist even if you don’t see them,) building, planning, observing size/shape relationship, construction principles, strengthening fine and gross motor skills, using language, frustration tolerance, cooperation with others and use of imagination and creativity. Blocks are a great staple for ages 3 months on up. So are many other staples introduced at very early ages.

The worst toys are those that do it all for the child–leave nothing left for the imagination (i.e.–one doll wets, another doll drinks from a bottle, and so on.) This stifles their creativity, spontaneity, experimentation and cognitive development.

The most important part of playing with your kids is to have fun. Additionally, once you understand the concept of developmental tasks, you will delight in watching as your kids move from phase to phase, building on the skills mastered in the previous stages to move on to new and wondrous discoveries and experimentations in the next.

TOP 5 TIPS OF THE WEEK:

  1. Play with your kids from infancy all the way into adulthood.
  2. Play builds developmental skills while enjoying your kids at the same time
  3. Keep the same toys around—kids will use the same toys in very different ways as they develop.
  4. Recognize that play is a very important activity for babies and toddlers to grow.
  5. Show your kids you love them…through your words and your actions.

Radio For Women

Playing With Your Kids—Ages 6 And Up

Friday, July 9th, 2010

Kids are from Krypton; Parents are from Pluto Radio series update July 8: As you know by now, (or read below) I am a great promoter of playing games with your kids at any age. Last week’s show focused on the tremendous benefits of playing Candyland with your little ones. Although this is purely a game of luck (with the pick of the cards,) with no problem-solving skills required, there are numerous skills that your kids are developing just by virtue of playing. We discussed over 20 developmental benefits of this simple game, including understanding the rules, taking turns, recognizing colors, counting to two, directionality, cause/effect, tolerating frustration, and so on.

This week, we focused on playing with the older kids. While you may have found yourself playing with your little ones, are you playing board and card games with your 7-year-old? Your 10-year-old? Your 15-year-old? There is still tremendous developmental benefit going on, not to mention a great way to stay connected with your kids—although I recommend getting them into the game-playing mode early on, so by the time they reached these older ages, it will be a natural thing to continue doing with their family.

Games for older kids build on the skills developed when younger and include risk-taking, problem-solving, logical reasoning, decision-making, strategizing, analyzing, verbal and math skills, money concepts, flexibility, and motor development including quick reflexes, steady hand, fine-motor control, team building and cooperation, patience and more!

For a building game like Jenga, just think of all the elements of development it takes to play. And, it can be adapted from a competitive game to one of cooperation. This, and any game, can be adapted for different ages. Jenga may seem a bit difficult for younger kids. So, let’s make it toddler-friendly: stack the blocks, count them, knock over each other’s tower, criss-cross their building, make different shapes.

Once you begin to understand the concept of using games as developmental building blocks (Ooh! Forgive the pun!) then you’ll see that games are fun, adaptable and most importantly, interactive! Grab a game and go have some fun. Enjoy your kids!

For young children, games involve: cognitive skills (such as counting, sequencing, directionality,) motor control (such as tossing dice, picking up a card, moving game pieces,) and self control (such as concentration, waiting their turn, being a good sport.) Games for older children build on the skills developed when younger, and include risk-taking, problem-solving, logical reasoning, decision-making, strategizing, analyzing, verbal skills, math skills, money concepts, creativity and flexibility. Motor development includes quick reflexes, a steady hand and fine-motor control (manipulation of smaller, more intricate pieces.) This kind of game analysis can be done with each and every game you play with your kids. There is more to game-playing than meets the eye. That is why it is so important that kids play games, and you can have the satisfaction of knowing that while you are spending time together and having fun, there is lots of learning and development going on, as well.

Top 5 Tips of the Week:

  1. Games have tremendous social, emotional, intellectual and creative benefits.
  2. Reintroduce the classic games and toys of your childhood, and those of your parents.
  3. Lighten up! It doesn’t matter if you feel too grown up to play—it’s about your kids!
  4. Games are great bonding activities…to help you stay connected with your kids.
  5. Show your kids you love them…through your words and your actions

Enjoy your kids!

Radio For Women


Enjoy your kids while you can!

Monday, August 17th, 2009
My awesome son

My awesome son

Today is my son’s birthday.  At 4:05 a.m., Alex turned 23.  Wow!  How did that happen???  Surely I haven’t aged that much!

It seems like only yesterday that he was  a baby!  Then, before I knew it he was going off to kindergarten.  And, I cried.  “Tomorrow he’ll be going to high school,” I lamented.  His dad laughed at me.

Then, sure enough… the next day he did, in fact, go off to high school.  Again, I cried.  “Tomorrow he’ll be going to college,” I sobbed.  Now, his dad wasn’t laughing. And, then, sure enough…off he went.  And now he’s in grad school!

It was amazing how different everything was without him.   No more running to soccer games and band concerts; no more bake sales and book fairs; no more science fair projects and poster contests.  The house was quiet, clothes and towels weren’t strewn around the bathroom, I could see his bedroom floor and there was no need to nag about taking out the garbage or emptying the dishwasher.

Sounds like every mother’s dream?  Be careful what you wish for!  I was miserable.

As a child psychologist, I work with parents who tend to fall into one of three categories:  the ones who can’t wait for the kids to leave home, the ones who never want their kids to leave and the ones who straddle the fence.

Time flies when you’re raising kids.  Sure, there are days that you feel like pulling your hair out…and your kid offering to do it for you!  And, then there are the times when your heart just bursts with love.

But, we can get too caught up in the daily drudge of homework, baths and discipline.  It’s easy to lose the joy of being a parent, spending time with the kids and watching them grow.   So…

Yes, you can yell at your daughter for spilling her milk.

You can tell your kids to “shut up” because they get too noisy.

You can resent all the dirty clothes piled on the floor.

You can spend the day giving your son the silent treatment.

Or not!

Bottom line?  It all goes away far too soon.  So, here’s my advice:

  • Cherish the little things
  • Don’t sweat the small stuff
  • Stop taking yourself so seriously
  • Laugh with your kids everyday
  • Pick your ‘no’s”
  • Have family time on a regular basis
  • Find ways to enjoy being a parent

So—how about it?  Do you pick and choose your battles?  Is seeing your little girl with your lipstick all over her face, or your son with his new shoes covered in mud really times to yell and blow your stack?  Or are they times to clean up, reprimand and secretly smile to yourself, filing the moment in your memory bank for heart-warming reflection at a later date?

Take it from someone who knows only too well…

It’s the little things that fill your home with the sweet presence of children.  And these moments will be gone before you know it.   When you won’t have to deal with muddy shoes, ‘borrowed’ lipstick and dirty laundry anymore… will that be a good thing?

So, enjoy your children— they grow up way too soon!

Child Development

Sunday, April 12th, 2009

kids

Dear Dr. Vicki,

I know that there are certain child development stages that all children go through. But what if my child hasn’t reached that stage and her friends the same age have?

Dr. Vicki’s advice:

I like to think of child development as climbing a staircase, with each step representing a series of tasks to work on and master before going on to the next step. All children climb the stairs, in their own way and in their own time. Using Erikson’s model of stages of development, I’ll take you up the staircase:

On the first step, newborns and infants (ages birth-2) must develop the belief that their needs will be taken care of, and that their world is a safe and secure environment.

Once they can trust, toddlers (ages 2-4) can move on to the next step, beginning to break away, venture out in the world, and assert themselves as individuals. Having established some independence, the next step involves initiation and risk.

The 4-6 year olds begin to try new things, risking attempts at new situations in preparation for the tasks of later life. It is important to allow these children to try new things, and reinforce their effort, regardless of outcome.

Now that they can risk, school-aged children (ages 6-12) move onto the next step, where they are working hard to master and achieve in many areas: academic success, self image, social interaction (negotiating relationships with peers), beginning to find out who they are (what do I like, what am I good at, etc.), moral development and impulse control. They need to feel a sense of achievement in all these areas to go on to the next step, where their identity and independence begins to solidify.

Remember, we all climb the stairs, taking time on each step to master the tasks needed in order to be successful on the next step. Some children run up the staircase, others crawl, others go up backwards or slowly, taking their own sweet time. And some get stuck on a step and stay there for a while, or actually regress and head back down to the previous step. But all children climb the stairs. As parents, our job is to help the climb, nudging in supportive encouragement, staying nearby to catch them if they fall, and cheering from the sidelines as they work hard to reach the next step.

And should you have any serious concerns about delays in your child’s development, consult with your pediatrician or a child psychologist.
© MMVI Vicki Panaccione, Ph.D.

Fashion Changes Shape – Model Embraces Full Figure

Thursday, March 15th, 2001

Mode magazine’s inclusion of full figure models tries to show that beauty, style and fashion come in all sizes, shapes and colors.

While that may be true for adult audiences, Melbourne (child) psychologist Dr. Vicki Panaccione who writes child development articles, says Mode’s real challenge may be to counteract the psychological damage inflicted on consumers whose idealized versions of themselves were set—and are continuing to be set—in childhood.

“I think it’s really an uphill battle for women, especially teens.” Panaccione says.

“Between puberty coming earlier and so much hype and emphasis on style and fashion that send out body messages for pre-teens, we’re seeing a lot of problems. Maybe the fashion world is beginning to change somewhat, but there’s a long way to go.”

As published in Florida Today, March 12, 2001.
Florida Today

© MMVI Vicki Panaccione, Ph.D.

* indicates required
dr vicki panaccione

Internationally recognized as a passionate and dedicated parent/child specialist, child psychologist "Dr. Vicki” Panaccione has spent the last 25 years helping thousands of families strengthen what she calls the "CaringConnection", the emotional bond between parents and children.

“Dr. Vicki is the author of Discovering Your Child: Parent Guide, and CaringConnections, her weekly online newsletter, helping parents find joy and fulfillment in their relationships
with their children. Read more...

 
 
Better Parenting Institute™ • Toll Free: 1 (877) 777-8068 • Phone: (321)-722-9001
600 E. Strawbridge Avenue, Suite 300 • Melbourne, FL 32901
© MMVI Better Parenting Institute™ & Dr. Vicki Panaccione All Rights Reserved. Privacy Policy.
Design & more by FreeMarket Media Group

Better Parenting Institute is proudly powered by WordPress
Entries (RSS) and Comments (RSS).