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Posts Tagged ‘http://www.heartbeatradiousa.com’
Friday, July 9th, 2010
Kids are from Krypton; Parents are from Pluto Radio series update July 8: As you know by now, (or read below) I am a great promoter of playing games with your kids at any age. Last week’s show focused on the tremendous benefits of playing Candyland with your little ones. Although this is purely a game of luck (with the pick of the cards,) with no problem-solving skills required, there are numerous skills that your kids are developing just by virtue of playing. We discussed over 20 developmental benefits of this simple game, including understanding the rules, taking turns, recognizing colors, counting to two, directionality, cause/effect, tolerating frustration, and so on.
This week, we focused on playing with the older kids. While you may have found yourself playing with your little ones, are you playing board and card games with your 7-year-old? Your 10-year-old? Your 15-year-old? There is still tremendous developmental benefit going on, not to mention a great way to stay connected with your kids—although I recommend getting them into the game-playing mode early on, so by the time they reached these older ages, it will be a natural thing to continue doing with their family.
Games for older kids build on the skills developed when younger and include risk-taking, problem-solving, logical reasoning, decision-making, strategizing, analyzing, verbal and math skills, money concepts, flexibility, and motor development including quick reflexes, steady hand, fine-motor control, team building and cooperation, patience and more!
For a building game like Jenga, just think of all the elements of development it takes to play. And, it can be adapted from a competitive game to one of cooperation. This, and any game, can be adapted for different ages. Jenga may seem a bit difficult for younger kids. So, let’s make it toddler-friendly: stack the blocks, count them, knock over each other’s tower, criss-cross their building, make different shapes.
Once you begin to understand the concept of using games as developmental building blocks (Ooh! Forgive the pun!) then you’ll see that games are fun, adaptable and most importantly, interactive! Grab a game and go have some fun. Enjoy your kids!
For young children, games involve: cognitive skills (such as counting, sequencing, directionality,) motor control (such as tossing dice, picking up a card, moving game pieces,) and self control (such as concentration, waiting their turn, being a good sport.) Games for older children build on the skills developed when younger, and include risk-taking, problem-solving, logical reasoning, decision-making, strategizing, analyzing, verbal skills, math skills, money concepts, creativity and flexibility. Motor development includes quick reflexes, a steady hand and fine-motor control (manipulation of smaller, more intricate pieces.) This kind of game analysis can be done with each and every game you play with your kids. There is more to game-playing than meets the eye. That is why it is so important that kids play games, and you can have the satisfaction of knowing that while you are spending time together and having fun, there is lots of learning and development going on, as well.
Top 5 Tips of the Week:
- Games have tremendous social, emotional, intellectual and creative benefits.
- Reintroduce the classic games and toys of your childhood, and those of your parents.
- Lighten up! It doesn’t matter if you feel too grown up to play—it’s about your kids!
- Games are great bonding activities…to help you stay connected with your kids.
- Show your kids you love them…through your words and your actions
Enjoy your kids!

Tags: board games, Candyland, Child Development, games, http://www.heartbeatradiousa.com, Jenga, Kids are from Krypton Parents are from Pluto, problem-solving skills, team building Posted in Child Development, Family, Parenting | Add a Comment »
Thursday, June 3rd, 2010
Kids Are From Krypton Parents Are From Pluto radio series update June 3: Spending time with your kids doesn’t have to cost a lot. The important thing is spending some time with your kids. It doesn’t have to be an elaborate activity and it doesn’t have to cost much money. It’s the time together that’s priceless. Here are some freebies or inexpensive activities you can do:
- Free matinee movies, free activities at the library
- Free activities for good grades such as: the bowling alley, a pizza place, book store
- The park—play Frisbee; kick a soccer ball; do potato sack races or 3-legged races; kick ball—some of the school yard games kids love
- The community pool—some places even have free swim lessons
- Sign kids up for a free/inexpensive activity and then cheer from the sidelines
- The beach—remember sand castles? Beach balls? Burying bodies in the sand?
- Go to the zoo. Family passes are usually pretty inexpensive—and then you have a built-in activity all year long. Many zoos have activities for the kids. And in a lot of cases, your zoo pass is accepted at other zoos around the area and/or museums. Check it out!
- Batting cages, putting greens (many golf courses have putting greens to practice without cost) or get a bucket of balls and hit at the driving range
- Miniature golf
- Feed the ducks and eat the bread as you go along
- Go to the dollar store—-pick out some things to put in a treasure chest as rewards or surprises
- Even theme parks and water parks like here in FL—have cut a lot of admission costs, or have FL resident passes, etc.
- Go fishing in the local pond or lake
- Camp out in the backyard, or in the living room!
- Roller skate or bike rides around the block. Parents—please wear helmets, too. Be a role model!

And if you just want to stay at home, there are lots of things to do:
- Make up a treasure hunt, a scavenger hunt—right in the house!
- Baking cookies, ice cream sundae bar, make your own pizzas—be creative
- Have dessert for breakfast
- Make popcorn for lunch and watch a movie
- Plan a movie night
- Camp out in the living room
- Make a fort out of a big cardboard box
- Crafts—looms, beading, knitting, arts and crafts, finger painting
- One girl decided she’d like to make a house for her cat—get creative
- Play dress up and make a movie
- Make a play to perform for the working parent, or video and send to grandparents
- Get started on making Xmas gifts
- Build a model together or get creative with Leggos, blocks…bring out the old Lincoln Logs or Tinker toys
- Play charades, guessing games, card games
- Do a big puzzle together
- Sing songs, have your kids share their music with you
The possibilities are endless— How about sending in some of your ideas??? Ask your kids!
Top 5 Tips of the Week:
- Take time to have fun with your kids
- You can find fun to do at home, outdoors or an inside activity
- Having fun doesn’t have to cost a lot of money
- Be creative and flexible—lighten up and laugh a lot
- Show your kids you love them…through your words and your actions
Enjoy Your Kids!

Tags: activities, beach, frisbee, http://www.heartbeatradiousa.com, kids, Kids are from Krypton Parents are from Pluto, parents, puzzle, zoos Posted in Family, Parenting | Add a Comment »
Friday, May 14th, 2010
Kids are from Krypton Parents are from Pluto Radio series update May 13: Today’s show focusing on the do’s and don’ts of discipline actually had only one ‘don’t.’ That being: Don’t use don’t! What? We are so conditioned to tell kids what not to do, that we very rarely tell them what they should do.
For instance, “Don’t Hit,” can be taught the same way by saying, “Keep your hands to yourself.” Another example might be: “Don’t be rude;” in the positive approach you might say: “Please say that with nicer words.” Same lesson, different tone. One tells kids what to move away from, and the other focuses on what to do, which leads them in a positive direction. This way, you tell them what action to take, rather than which path not to take. And, it also teaches kids to focus on their own positives. For instance, they can get 2 wrong on a math test or 8 right. Which do you think builds them up? How you phrase things can build kids up or knock them down.
Top 5 Tips of the Week
- Set positive expectations
- Focus on what your kids are doing right
- Give positive feedback
- Reward the desired behavior
- Show your kids you love them…through your words and your actions
Enjoy your kids!

Tags: behavior, children, Discipline, http://www.heartbeatradiousa.com, kids, Kids are from Krypton Parents are from Pluto, reward Posted in Discipline, Parenting | Add a Comment »
Monday, May 3rd, 2010
Kids are from Krypton; Parents are from Pluto Radio series update April 29: Did you know that kids who are spanked on a regular basis are more likely to have low self-esteem, depression, lower grades and consequently lower paying jobs? Spanked kids are more aggressive when younger, tend to grow up to spank their kids, learn not only that it’s OK to hit when angry, but it’s also permissible to use objects as weapons (belts, wooden spoons, etc.) And, more disturbing to me is the fact that kids learn to fear rather than respect their parents, and come to rely less on them for their own security and safety.
The next few weeks will be focusing on alternatives to spanking.
Top 5 Tips of the Week:
- Remember the object of discipline is to teach.
- Before raising your hand, ask one question: Do I love him?
- Foster respect, not fear.
- Recognize that just because your parents spanked, doesn’t mean you have to.
- Show your kids you love them…through your words and your actions.
Enjoy your kids!

Tags: anger, angry, Discipline, http://www.heartbeatradiousa.com, kids, kids aggressive, Kids are from Krypton Parents are from Pluto, parents, spanking Posted in Discipline, Parenting | 4 Comments »
Saturday, April 24th, 2010
Radio series update April 22: Last week we discussed the importance of getting in touch with your own anger, and ways strategies for dealing with it. This week was all about your kids…why they get angry, how they deal with it and what to do about it. Because kids basically get in trouble for ‘being angry,’ most think that anger is not OK. In other words, it’s bad to be angry.
Your job is to teach your kids that anger is a human emotion like any other and it’s OK to feel any way they feel. The way they express that anger, through their words and actions, is what may need to be contained and managed in appropriate ways. Setting a good example is key, along with allowing the feeling and providing acceptable outlets for expression of their anger. And perhaps most importantly…please don’t expect your kids to handle their anger better than the grown-ups!
Top 5 Tips for the Week:
- Separate your child’s feeling from the behavior
- Validate the feeling even before dealing with the behavior
- Provide acceptable outlets for expression of anger
- Model self-control and anger management skills
- Show your kids you love them…through your words and your actions
Enjoy your kids!

Tags: anger, http://www.heartbeatradiousa.com, kids Posted in Parenting | Add a Comment »
Sunday, April 11th, 2010
Radio Series Update April 8: “My kids really know how to push my buttons!” As the title suggests, this week we recognized that your ‘buttons’ are your particular emotional hot spots. If you think back, some of your ‘buttons’ may very well be the same parental buttons you pushed when you were a kid. How your parents responded to certain behaviors of yours, is how you learned to respond to the same behaviors of your kids. It’s so conditioned, you may not even realize you are continuing a conditioned pattern. For instance, if when you whined, your mother or father went absolutely ballistic, you learned that parents have an aversion to whining. You then carried that learning into adulthood and now automatically respond to your kids’ whining the same way your parents responded to your whining…you go ballistic! You are then passing this response on to your kids UNLESS you take yourself off auto-pilot and learn to deal with the behavior without an emotional upheaval.
So, get this: You don’t have to accept an invitation to a fight. Remember: if your kid’s behavior starts to evoke your emotional response to fight…you don’t have to take the challenge. If your kid throws out a rope, and expects you to begin a tug-of-war…there can’t be a fight or a tug if you don’t pick up the rope! It takes 2 to fight; it takes 2 to have a tug of war. Your kids can only ‘push your buttons’ if you let them. Becoming aware of what sets you off, gives you the power to change those buttons to snaps…then there is nothing left to push! Subsequently, when faced with the same behavior, your response will be very different. You can leave the rope on the ground and discipline from a place of teaching, rather than screeching!
Top 5 Tips of the Week :
- Learn to spot your emotional ‘hot’ buttons—your kids sure do!
- Change your ‘buttons’ to snaps…so there’s nothing left to ‘push.’
- Discipline only when you are calm and rational.
- There can only be a ‘tug of war’ if you pick up the rope!
- Show your kids you love them—through your words and your actions.
Next week: Anger doesn’t cause problems…it’s the behavior that’s at fault!
Join us on www.heartbeatradiousa.com every Thursday at 1:30 eastern.
Enjoy your kids!

Tags: behavior, Discipline, http://www.heartbeatradiousa.com, kids, parents Posted in Discipline, Parenting | Add a Comment »
Thursday, April 1st, 2010
Radio show update: Stop Shooting Yourself in the Foot! Today’s show focused on some of the major ways that parents undermine their own authority. Before you can effectively discipline your kids, you need to assume a position of respect and authority. However, most parents, particularly moms, have the tendency to sabotage themselves in the following ways:
Parents tend to feel that it is more important to take care of their kids than it is to take care of themselves. However, that couldn’t be farther from the truth! You need to show that you are important, and you take care of your own needs. If you don’t, then you are not respecting yourself; it will be difficult for others to respect you. Doormats are not very respected or honored. They are usually walked all over!

Saying something and not following through teaches your kids that you don’t mean what you say. The more you don’t implement a stated consequence, the more you undermine your authority, the more your kids learn not to take you seriously!
Inconsistency regarding what your rules are, and how you respond to your kids’ behavior leaves them in a state of confusion. When sometimes they get away with things and sometimes they don’t—they may as well keep trying to get away with it. Being able to count on a certain response to their behavior will provide a sense of predictability and security. And will teach them that every time they misbehave in a certain way, a certain consequence will occur.
Parents are not consistently holding their kids accountable for their actions. When your kids misbehave, they need to face the consequences of their actions. Moms tend to give up and do for their kids to avoid arguing. For instance, “I am tired of telling you to clean your rooms. So, I’m going to do it!” Oh, that will teach them!
Again, setting the example is crucial. If you want your kids to behave a certain way, they need to see it. Live a life of self-discipline, and that’s the model by which your kids will learn to live theirs.
Top 5 tips (+1) of the week:
- Treat yourself with respect
- Follow through with what you say
- Be consistent with what you do
- Hold your kids accountable
- Set the example of self-discipline
- Show your kids you love them—through your words and your actions.
Enjoy your kids!

Tags: authority, http://www.heartbeatradiousa.com, kids, Kids are from Krypton Parents are from Pluto, Parenting, parents Posted in Communication, Discipline, Family, Parenting | Add a Comment »
Thursday, March 18th, 2010
Radio show update: Today we wrapped up the communication topic on my radio series, discussing some of the times, places and methods of talking with your kids. Dinner time as a family can be a wonderful time for everyone to share about their day, or anything else they might want to talk about. It can be a time to get to know some things about them that you usually don’t take the time to discuss. On the other hand, it is NOT time to grill them, chastise them or bark orders.

Here is some advice of how to make dinner time the focus of your attention: Turn off the TV, and all other electronic distractions; don’t answer any phones; ban cell phones, etc. from the table; have everyone seated at the table—no one gets to take a plate into their own room or sit in front of the TV or computer. Give each child (and parent, too) their own opportunity to speak; the others need to wait their turn. Make family time truly family time.
Top 5 Tips of the Week:
- Any place can create an opportunity to talk with your kids.
- Make it fun—not every conversation has to be serious or teaching a lesson.
- Find out something new about each of your kids everyday.
- Use your power of observation to respond to your kids’ reactions, in order to keep the conversation going.
- Show your kids you love them—through your words and your actions.
Enjoy your kids…one conversation at a time!
Tags: children, Communication, conversation, Family, http://www.heartbeatradiousa.com, kids, Parenting, parents Posted in Child Development, Communication, Family, Parenting | Add a Comment »
Friday, March 12th, 2010
Radio series update: What Kids Would Tell You…If Only You’d Ask! This week, we explored conversations you don’t need to have with your kids! Think about this: When’s the last time you had a conversation with your kids? I don’t mean, “How was school?” or “What do you have for homework?” or “Did you clean your room, brush your teeth?” I mean an honest to goodness conversation about some random topic. A chance to talk, explore and get a glimpse of how your child thinks. For most parents, the answer to the question is a resounding… “I don’t have a clue.”
And here’s an interesting observation:
- There are lots of people, books and TV shows telling parents what they SHOULD talk to their kids about: sex, drugs, drinking and driving, etc.
- There are other sources that will suggest conversations you SHOULD have from a faith-based point of view.
- And then there are the conversations I encourage you to have. They are about nothing and everything.
In fact, you could spend your whole life NEVER having any of these conversations with your kids—and you’ll never miss them…EXCEPT—you will. What you’d miss are the opportunities to get to know your kids…one conversation at a time—by finding out about what they think, how they feel…about their opinions, ideas, and dreams. My book, What Kids Would Tell You…If Only You’d Ask has 101 conversation topics you can have with your family. Each page has a topic question and then blank spaces for you to later jot down sweet tidbits to capture for a lifetime. The book is Priceless…because no one else can write your commentary. Only you will have this one-of-a-kind journal for a lifetime. Or to pass along to your kids when they become parents… Here are just a few examples:
- If you could change the world, what would you do?
- What super power would you like to have? What would you do with it?
- Do you think there are such things as flying saucers/aliens? What if you saw one?
- If you could invent something, what would it be?
- What’s your favorite movie? Hero? Villain? If you could jump into the movie who would you be and what would you do?
- What do you like about yourself? Don’t like? What would you like to change?
- What are you good at? Not so good at? What would you like to be good at?
These are the kind of conversations you can have around the dinner table—with parent participation, please—or in the car, during bath or bedtime, etc. These are the kinds of things that we rarely stop and explore with our children. (You might try to guess ahead of time, and see if you are right!)
And, I bet you’ll be surprised at some of the responses.
Enjoy your kids!
Want more ideas? Check out my parent guide: What Kids Would Tell You…If Only You’d Ask! http://www.betterparentinginstitute.com
And please feel free to send me some of your own and your kids’ ideas.
Tags: children, conversation, http://www.heartbeatradiousa.com, kids, Parenting, parents, radio show, WRHB Posted in Child Development, Communication, Family, Parenting | Add a Comment »
Friday, March 5th, 2010
Update from heartbeatradiousa.com: The comments are streaming in—parents love this new show! Today we talked about ways to listen—in order to keep the lines of communication open between you and your kids.

Here’s a brief summary:
There are many times that we hear the words, but don’t listen to the meaning. Or we attend to words, but not body language, tone and what isn’t being said. Communication involves the ability to pay attention to what your kids think and feel. It means not to talk, but to listen. When kids feel that you listen, they will talk to you. If they feel that you listen to the little things, then they are more likely to bring bigger issues to you as they arise. Listening builds trust. When you listen, you are telling your kids that what they have to say is important to you.
Top 5 Tips for the Week:
- Give your kids your undivided attention.
- Listen without interruption or judgment.
- Ask open-ended questions.
- Thank them for sharing.
- Show your kids you love them…through your words and your actions.
Tags: children, Communication, http://www.heartbeatradiousa.com, kids, Kids Are From Krypton, listen, listening, parents, Parents Are From Pluto Posted in Child Development, Communication, Family, Parenting | Add a Comment »
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Internationally recognized as a passionate and dedicated parent/child specialist, child psychologist "Dr. Vicki” Panaccione has spent the last 25 years helping thousands of families strengthen what she calls the "CaringConnection", the emotional bond between parents and children.
“Dr. Vicki is the author of Discovering Your Child: Parent Guide, and CaringConnections, her weekly online newsletter, helping parents find joy and fulfillment in their relationships
with their children. Read more... |
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